The Road to Amalfi

You know how when someone gives you directions but you don't get it fully, you just sort of nod and then go in the general direction they point? You're already planning to ask someone else just a little further down the road. That has been life in Italy, especially when the free maps from the tourist information office or hotel are not very specific.

That was not about to work for driving to the Amalfi Coast. The jolly man at Europcar, where we went to pick up the rental, said, "It's so easy. You a right, right, big circle, a Napoli." My dad asked him to go outside and point. That at least got us to the main street he was talking about.

Dad is great at driving. Really. He's driven tons of cars, and has a great little Honda convertible with a stick shift now. I'd probably stall out on the Autostrada. But driving and directing are two very different things, and my Mom bless her heart was almost no help. She just kept finding highway names that she remembered from the directions--I'll get back to that.

Cars were flying around us and it felt like we should have huge magnets on both sides of the car: TOURISTS. The motorcycles especially--they take traffic lights and lanes as suggestions. We manage to get onto the "big circle," a highway that rings the outer limits of Rome (think Atlanta, St. Louis, etc.). We make it to A1, the highway that will take us all the way to Naples. We feel pretty dang proud of ourselves. We're even handling the toll boths with a level of finesse.

Highways make me sleepy, and since we had about 50 kilometers or so before Naples, I tell my parents I'm going to rest. The next directions are "after leaving Naples, take A3 toward Solerno." They were going to wake me up when we got to Naples so I could make sure we went the right way.

They wake me up with, "A3, right? A3!?" My mom is pointing, "There, David. Right, Emily? A3 to Salemro?" (She remember it from the directions.)

Sitting up and squinting, I agree and we take the exit in the nick of time. "That was fast," I said. "Why didn't you wake me when we got to Naples?"

"We haven't gotten to Naples," my dad said.

"But the directions were for after Naples."

"It said A3."

I guess there were two starting points for A3. I was so frustrated. And got on my high horse thinking, if they would have just done what I said. By the time we turned around...Wait, picture this: we go through the toll both, pay, and whip around to get back on as a large truck comes flying at us...we probably could have just taken another road. Meanwhile, my mom is laughing so hard she gets the hiccups. As we drive on there's another stupid fork in the road, and my dad freaks out. "Which one?"

"Straight," I say.

"But Napoli--" he points, to the left.

My mom is saying something, there's total confusion, and I literally yell as loud as I can, "STRAIGHT!!!" Dad drives straight. Mom hiccups.

We get back to A1 and I started laughing and apologized to my dad for yelling at him. Then, oh my word do the Italian directions nail us again. We got almost to Solerno before we realized it and turned around yet again. It was ridiculous. The trip was only supposed to take us about 2 hours, and I think we turned it into four.

But it was worth it. If you are prone to jealousy, please do not look at the following pictures. I didn't take that many, because at that point we were just ready to get to the hotel. Mike and Amy, we are sorry. We really wish you were here. Mom finally got her pool. Here are some views from the roof of our hotel. We're staying in Praiano. You can see Positano in the distance.

Don't be fooled, he's sucking in. And he thinks it's funny.

Our hotel's restaurant has a porch with a great view.